My Two Cents

I read something today that confused me. It was written by an acquaintance of mine who was talking about a social issue and what they believed in regards to it. They took a stand on one side of the issue and it was a noble stand that I think many of us would mentally ascend to taking. But in my initial admiration I started looking at this specific person's conduct relative to the issue they were speaking of and the experiences I've personally had with this individual. It made me wonder what side they really were on. Their actions and words did not match.

It's easy to put in words what we think we believe. And in some ways just expressing our values can blind friends and loved ones who want to believe what we're saying. Identifying our principles also make us feel better about ourselves and where we stand...But when these things are tested, tempted and teased our actions, not our words, end up defining what we believe.

And honestly I am not writing this as one who stands at a vantage point of judgment but instead I speak of personal experience. There is a lot of things I said I stood for, believed in and valued. I've been through a lot of testing in the last year or so and learned about myself that my actions and my spoken values are truly something I need to work on matching up with the other. It's tougher than it seems when you are walking through the fire!

SOME of My Favorite Combinations of Words

Still lacking significant inspiration to form my own stream of thoughts. So instead I wanted to share with you some of the words that inspire me.

"I see before me a man, with all his good and all his bad. I simply see a man."

Those are the goggles I see people through. We're all human, we all have our fair share of good and bad and we all need love!

"There's always some madness in love but there is always some reason in madness!"


While you may not have to search at all for the madness, you most likely will have to search for the "reason". It's worth the hunt.

"Lost are the days of innocent guiltlessness. Lost are our heroic dreams and everlasting intrigue. Never to be lost are our tempted hopes."

Never lose hope. If you lose that, you truly lose everything!

"Lovers don't finally meet somewhere. They're in each other all along." Rumi

When you find love it is often like finding a long lost, missing piece of yourself. It's when your heart finds commonality, extension, rest and passion in anothers. And then you realize it was there all along, you just needed the right person to awaken it.

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." SYDNEY J. HARRIS

I've certainly found this to be true in my life. The saying, "Live with no regrets" has some truth. If you regret the things you have done, change. Move on. If you find regret for the things you haven't done, didn't say, etc. And the opportunity has now passed you by, that you can never change.

I Tweeted a Story or Two

It has been way too long since I've updated here. I miss my personal blogging but have been lacking both the time and inspiration of late. I'm not the type of blogger that likes to write and update everyone on my life happenings. I try to approach my blogging like a public journal of my random thoughts and opinions, giving me a forum to express myself. But I did decide to update today with a few personal life items for the entertainment and lucrative value.

Recently entered another writing contest. It is called Tweet Me A Story and is hosted by New York City Midnight Madness. I had to write a story using a word that was randomly assigned to me. The story could only be 140 characters in length including spaces. Thus the title "Tweet" as the contest was inspired by the length limitation of Twitter (you can now follow me on Twitter if you are so inclined to recieve my oober exciting updates at Marian116). The word assigned to me was Sharp. These are the top 3 stories I submitted:

1. The knife so sharp, the flesh on her finger a delicacy. A pineapple its one obstacle to penetration. Salivating, sliding, slipping…success!

2. My will to survive fortified. It came down to my life or my arm. The sharp agony of pain intensified as I began to saw through flesh & bone.

3. A nurse approached my bed, needle in hand. Panting, sweating I turned my head. The prick was sharp and precise. My world is fading to black.

I found the contest extremely entertaining and somewhat challenging. Most who have read and critiqued the first story have requested clarification. It is basically a concise version of a time I cut my finger with a very sharp knife while slicing a pineapple. It is written from the knife's p.o.v. :)

You can always catch my writing on examiner.com. I have a link to it to your right on this page. I think some of my followers and friends have misinterpreted that site as another blogging spot for me. It's not. I am employed by Examiner to be a reporter on National Pop Music. And while they give me liberty to write about whatever I went within that sphere I don't make money unless I pick popular topics that people are searching for online. It's not that I'm crazy about all the artists or bands I am writing about but I report what I find to be hot and popular. Simply stated that is how I earn the cash. If you wanna help me out, just hit my site once a day. Even if you don't read what I post, your mouse click nets me some money.

Since this blog entry is getting way too long for my liking, I'm gonna sign off for now. Keep checking in. I will try to get back on the bandwagon here!

Hugs and Love to you!

Appearances

Is it better to maintain the "appearance" of innocence or to be innocent of maintaining "appearances"?*

Would you rather have people thinking the best of you while you constantly maintain the appearance of having your world all put together. Or do you prefer to live openly and shield the shots in judgment and criticism as they fly by? It's just human nature - we all do it - we judge things and make assumptions based on what we see right?

Many people from my past and present are rising up and asking me about what they see or what "appears" to be a reality in my life recently. Most of the concerned critics wouldn't have a window into my world if it weren't for cyberspace and social networking. With that in mind I accept responsibility for what I share. And often what is posted on those sites is a reflection of the truth but is often only one small aspect and fragment of my reality.

Regardless of people's perception of me and who they thought I was and am, etc. I have been authentic in my posting both here and on my social networks. It's only a small percentage of what I do and how I spend some of my time but this small percentage is just as real as what you don't see me doing.

I can't fairly be upset for long at those who form their opinions of me based exclusively on what they see online. After all I'm the one willingly sharing and posting both online and off. I guess that is the price I pay to be innocent of maintaining the "appearance" that makes perception comfortable. I'm secure enough in my world to face the scrutiny and controversy that authenticity brings.


*copyright - Marian Tuin, 2009 - All Rights Reserved

A Little Yin in Your Yang

Why is it that our human nature often wants what we can't have? What is it about the "can't" or "no" that makes whatever that thing is more attractive? And you know what I've found? Just the knowledge that I can't have what I want doesn't always save me from going after what I can't have.

In some regards I guess that's a good thing. Like when someone tells you you can't reach your goal or accomplish your dreams and then you do it any way. And maybe that's why we have the constant struggle with the things we can't have. Maybe it's because a percentage of the time we actually need to push through and grab the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Can I just say, the struggle over all the rest really sucks. Especially if you are a stubborn red-headed girl!:)

Control

"I can change almost anything. I can't change human nature."

Funny how quotes are interrupting my thoughts and influencing my writing of late. I heard the one above on a new sci-fi-ish movie preview last night. It was a most unlikely place for inspiration and I have no idea what context the quote is taken from but how true it rings.

There's a lot of things in our lives we can change from our hair and eye color to the size of our lips, chests, stomachs... We can change our look, we can change where we live, who we associate with. We can change our names, our jobs, the stations we watch and/or listen to. We can change how and what we eat, drink, wear. We have been given the power by technology and our creator to change almost anything save one integral part of life, human nature.

In general I know what human nature is defined by. Our thoughts, emotions, our heart. But I wanted to find a technical definition as reference to my own interpretation. Wikipedia defined it as: The set of logical characteristics, including ways of thinking, feeling and acting that all normal human beings have in common. However, it is possible to change thoughts, feelings and even actions; they are temporal and fleeting. So what is it about human nature that we can't change?

We can't change how others will turn and direct their thoughts, feelings and actions towards us. And as much as I've wanted to do that at times, it's never worked out for me. So I guess I took the long way around to simply say, the only real control I have in this universe is over myself. And truly accepting that is profound.

Making Love

I ran across a quote yesterday that I loved and it provided much food for thought. The quote said this,

"Most people don't know how to make love."

Initially my thoughts turned toward sex as most of yours just did;), so I'll start there. What is making love vs. having sex? On a basic level sex only requires the physical meeting of two partners. Making love suggests emotions and intimacy and is usually indicative of a relationship. In a culture saturated with skin and sex and lust I'd have to agree many don't know how to slow down, connect and MAKE love...

But making love outside of the bedroom is also a legitimate issue most people don't take the time to do. It takes caring and effort to create love in the space of your world. To give love to the people who love you and others who don't, isn't easy and is certainly risky! What if you loose that relationship? What if the person rejects your attempts to love? What if in giving love you loose and get hurt?

We're all so used to the generics in life. Getting the physical fix without the emotional fulfillment. And why? I think for most it's easier that way. It's self-protection. If we don't get attached, make love and/or get our emotions involved we don't get hurt. By keeping love at bay we can walk away and brush it off if it doesn't work out. No harm no foul.

Not me, I wanna know how to create and make love and do it well! I don't care how much it hurts. The pay off of real love is so much more than the generic version. To live and to love without restraints and regrets, to me, is truly living. Seriously what else were our emotions and senses given to us for?

Experience life, feel it! Do it people. And know I love you!:)

M.I.A.

I can't believe it's been almost three weeks since I updated here. What kind of a blogger am I?? Definitely not active enough on this site of late. That is in part because I've been posting 2-3 times per week on examiner.com. I've spent a lot of time I would have otherwise allotted to blogging trying to familiarize myself with their publishing tools and system. I am enjoying writing for examiner because it combines two things that I love - music and writing! So if you miss me (I hope so) and need a quick blog fix you can always jump over there to hear my random music raves, reviews and opinions several times a week. And if there is anything you want me to research and write about send me your ideas. I'm always open to that!

Becuase I'm in the music creative vein I ran into a song while digging through the Grammy nominations last week that I absolutely love!! I relate to it on so many different levels. One of the lines in this song says: "A life perfect, ain't perfect if you don't know what the struggle's for.". That line exposed new elements of an old fundamental truth. In reality we never reach the "perfect" life but we all dream and anticipate getting to a happy place in our journey's. A place where we've accomplished goals we've set and dreams we've worked to achieve. But we can't get there without the struggle and neglect, even poverty. The struggle is what makes the end result taste all the sweeter. If you never fight for anything, you never win...The struggle is part of the perfection in the end.

I'll leave you with those thoughts...and as always my love!

XO

Examine This

I have been busy burning a hole in my keyboard lately!! I'm chasing down lots of writing opportunities as usual and...I finally have a small writing breakthrough:). I was accepted to blog on Examiner.com. I am the National Pop Music Examiner and will be paid based on how many hits I generate to my page. Yeahya! I was hoping to entice you to "pop" in over there and check me out from time to time...Or all the time is fine too:). To find me you can click here: Pop Music Examiner or simply go to examiner.com and search National Pop Music Examiner. I will also be adding the link to the "I'd Hit That" List to your immediate right. I only have one blog posted but hope to get busy with a couple more soon. I'm still trying to figure out their system and process.

In other news, I turned 30! Yep I've officially joined the young and accomplished club, ha:)! And I want to say thank you to all of you that made my day AMAZING. I was truly overwhelmed by your love and wishes. There were so many different ways you all made my b-day special from the gifts and cards to the 30+ of you that showed up to celebrate with me. I truly look forward to paying the love forward to all of you all year long!

And believe it or not, that is only the tip of the iceburg for me this year! I will post more updates and blogs as they materialize. I hope to keep the momentum rolling!

Love to all of you!

Digging for Gold

You will miss out on so much of life if you fail to look deeper than the surface of any human being!

I LOVE people. It's just the way I was made. I've tried to live by this rule for much of my life and I feel that I'm richer for doing so. I try to look at people from the inside out and then form my first impressions, not the other way around. At times it's easier than others but I have found good in every person I've met in life. You'll never be sorry if you approach the people in your world this way. And like me, you'll probably fall in love with people if you succeed! :)

Everyone out there has something to offer and so much will be missed if you don't take the time to dig for gold!