Snow Day

It's as if God decided all of us here in Colorado needed to slow down because we are getting socked in with a major winter storm! I love it! Stores are closing early due to snow, events are being rescheduled and people stayed home from work. The ones that did venture out in the storm are mostly concerned with getting home where they will be safe and warm to weather the storm (accept my husband of course - he is still working and plans to stay for awhile)...:)

If there is one gift on my list every year that only God could give me, this is it! A white Christmas and a cozy holiday! Thank you God for the early gift and the reminder that it really is better to slow down and enjoy the simple things in life.

My plans for the day? Hot cocoa, maybe building a snowman with the kids, oh and a little shoveling to help Eric out so when he does come home he can slow down with us:)! I have of course attached a few pictures of the weather which really don't do this storm justice. A view of the front of our house (top), a view from the back porch and my self-portrait and though it isn't awesome it makes me giggle:)! Maybe it will do the same for you!

Until next time....

Wasting Time

Sooo... I just spent the last two hours wasting time that I should have spent doing other higher priority tasks. It felt really good! It is the first time in a long while that I have allowed myself to do that. I thought since I was on a roll, hey what the heck, time to catch up on blogging:)!

I'm overstating the obvious when I say I've been busy - who hasn't right?! Christmas shopping, company Christmas party planning, Christmas cards, etc., etc., etc. I wish I had some exciting revelation or important news to catch you all up on but I don't. And maybe that is the lesson of it all - life gets by us unnoticed if we are too busy to pay attention. I think I slowed down just enough today to take notice...

Merry Christmas to all of you - just in case I don't post again before Christmas! I will be talking to you again in the new year if not before:). Hopefully before - but don't hold your breath:)! That could be really dangerous:)!!

Where Have I Been?

I know it has been awhile since I last posted. I'm not sure why my post on Benjamin's first birthday disappeared for awhile, but it is back up now, as am I:)!

I have been soo busy of late and I can't believe that half of the holiday season is already passed. I keep reminding myself to just relax and take in the moments but all too often I get wound up or caught up in the busyness of life and details.

I don't really have much to say except to remind you and me that life is precious and time once spent can never be earned back. Spend your time wisely. I think I would rather be rich with memories of time well spent and love given then materially wealthy. What about you? Give yourself the gift of time this Christmas!

Happy Holidays and I promise to post again soon!!

A Year

Our little son, Benjamin, turns one on Sunday! I'm not sure if I'm more shocked that a year has passed without me realizing it or that my baby boy is not a baby anymore!! I always thought time flew before, but have kids and you completely loose track of it!

I wanted more than anything with this blog to do a picture tribute to him to show how much the first year is a physical miracle of growth. The pictures below show Benjamin at birth, three months, six months and now.

Happy Birthday Benny! We're glad you are here! Life would not be as full without you!:)

The Hardest Lesson of Humanity

I know it has been awhile since I last posted and thought I would catch you up on my most current events with pictures instead of words. After all doesn't a picture speak a thousand words...? I will probably narrorate 30-40 of those thousand words for you though:)!



On Friday night we went to see The Lion King at the Buell Theatre downtown. It is an amazing sensory show that is worth experiencing at least once.




On Saturday night I had WAY too much fun at a Halloween party and like Cinderella danced until the clock struck twelve:)! Good times!





Sunday, energy level waning thin, I had the opportunity to see one of the seasons most exciting Bronco games live! By this time I was missing our kids and ready to return to my quiet life with them. Seeing others' children at the game made me want to run home and hold my own...


By Tuesday I decided that I am proof positive of the statement, "You always want what you can't have," because I was already thinking that maybe I wanted to go back to work a few days a week.

Maybe my lesson isn't learned but in the midst of my ramblings I was reminded yet again that contentment is perhaps the hardest lesson of humanity...

Sweet Dreams Sweet Dreamer

Here's a little story I wrote a year or so ago. I'm trying to launch a career in writing AND now I am letting my big secret out to all of you, my loyal blog readers. I want some feedback on this one. This is intended to be a bedtime story for youngest readers or better described as youngest listeners:). It has been reviewed by editors, but no one is biting the line. Let me know your thoughts and/or edits. Maybe you can help me get this to print.

PS (If you are not a member of Blogger and wish to post a comment you simply click on the comment button at the bottom of this blog. Type your comment and click Annonymous under "Identity". Then hit "Login and Publish". If you want me to know who you are - sign your name:) - otherwise you will remain truly annonymous...)

SWEET DREAMS SWEET DREAMER

Thanks for the feedback on this story. I removed it because I am so encouraged by your encouragement that I am going to continue to submit it for publication and don't want it online before it has my name attached to it in print:). If you want to read it though and missed it while it was posted just email me and I would be happy to send you a copy.

Things You Can Learn at a Stoplight...

I was sitting at a stoplight this afternoon and while I was waiting for the light to change I noticed a twitching, wet snout sticking out the window in the vehicle in front of me. It appeared to belong to some kind of retriever type dog. Life was good for him at that moment; the smell of the air, the fall breeze dancing over the top of his fur - he was on top of the world. This made me wonder how nice life would be as a dog, the simple thrill of a car ride making my day!

Curious now, I wanted to see who this dog belonged to and so my eyes drifted to the men in the front seat. From behind they looked kind of scruffy and hefty, the kind of men that would probably intimidate me if we passed on the street. They didn't look particularly well kept and yet this dog was their loyal fan, which led me to this conclusion... Dogs don't care what we look like, smell like, or how we even behave; they simply love us because that is their nature. I can personally say I have never met a judgmental dog - other than one protecting his property or people.

Lesson learned at the stoplight: simplify my approach to life and think and treat others more like a dog would. How long has it been since I've stopped long enough to enjoy the smell of fall in the air or to "wag my tail" when the people I love are near?!

My Head, Inside and Out...

Yikes! A peek inside my head right now might be frightful. There is a lot going on and nothing coming out:). I'm sitting here trying to think of something remarkable to write about and nothing is coming. There are so many thoughts and emotions running on the super highway of my brain its causing a traffic jam. All the good stuff is in gridlock. I'm sure something good will come to me soon, so hang in there and I will post something new and interesting as soon as I figure out what that might be.

For your own personal entertainment I am posting a collage of my celebrity look alikes. I did this on at a site called myheritage.com which allows you to upload a picture of yourself and it then matches your features to those of celebrities. Have fun and let me know which celebrities you match up to.

The World's Shortest Fairy Tale

I don't really feel this way about married life, but I got this email today and it is still cracking me up. I'm feeling sassy so I thought I would post it in case it brings a smile to you too. Although most of you probably got this from me in a forwarded email... Will post again soon:)!


The World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy, "Will you marry me?" The guy said "No" and the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, stayed skinny, and was never farted on.

The end.

Oh How the Years Go By...

I can't believe it has already been more than a week since the last time I posted! It never ceases to amaze me how some seasons of life go by so quickly! An example is summer - I can't believe it's officially over:(. Where did it go? Seriously, in my mind, it is still July - maybe August and in reality the first day of October is only 3 days away!

This weekend Eric and I celebrated our seventh Anniversary together! Speaking of time flying...:)! Neither of us feel a day older than the day we married but some how two kids, five places of residence and seven years later, here we are!

Time seems to be my Blog theme of late... Maybe I am just realizing that it (time) is getting away from me and I can never get it back. It makes me nervous because I don't want to waste the time I have now...I know if I waste money or material possesions, in theory, I can earn more and replace what has been lost or wasted. Not so with Father time.

Today, I am resolved to make the most of the time I have and even if I don't spend it doing anything noteworthy or earth shattering according to the history books, at least I will be able to close my eyes at night with a sense of contentment and satisfaction. Errr - I hope!

Intelletual Riot

I've been trying to write a blog since yesterday at about this time. I'm struggling because there is so much I want to say and somehow when I try to release it the words and thoughts get jumbled together. I'm sure I don't want people to misunderstand me, but I'm also sure I want to express myself authentically...Not on the surface as I do so often when I am face to face with someone... When asked how I'm doing the reply is usually, "Good!" or "I'm hanging in there." if things aren't so good, but it's all superficial. That is all they want to know and that is all I give them.

So how am I doing today? Not so good - struggling really. I feel somewhat like I am suffocating. Inside of me there is this young, fiesty girl with dreams... Really I have pushed her back into the shadows since becoming a mom. Lately it seems like she has been screaming louder and kicking harder for some time and space and freedom, but the demands of the roles I am placed in won't allow for much if any of that. I feel like so much is expected of me and I don't have time, let alone energy to pursue the things that I really want to.

Do I regret my role as a full-time mom, homemaker and wife? No. They were all my choices and I take responsibility for them. However I feel there has to be a balance between my roles/responsibility and my humanity. I just don't know how to find that... I don't know how to let who I am and what I am exhale without compromising the quality and standard of life I have been giving my family. And they deserve that quality time... I really believe they do...

I guess I am just afraid that by the time my children are older and some freedom returns, my youth will have escaped me. I want to be young while I am young and not look back with regrets. My choices have put me in the position I am in today and I don't regret them but I do wish I had a little more freedom and time for me. Is that selfish?


PS (The John Mayer concert was GREAT! He is perhaps better live than recorded and in my opinion that makes for an amazing artist! I borrowed the title of this blog from him. He claims that is the name of his next recording. Whether it is or not we won't know for a year or two but you heard it first from me:)!)

Continuum

I just bought the new John Mayer cd this morning and I love it! Yes, admittedly I am a John Mayer fan but I think this is his best album yet. Music is powerful, evokes emotion, gets us dancing, humming, singing, thinking, etc. So I thought exerpts of my favorite lyrics off this new cd might be a good discussion starter. By the way - I get to see him live in concert on Monday (my next post will probably have some mention of it)!

If you don't already have this cd I highly reccomend it! Here are a few of my fav. lines!

"Now, if we had the power to bring our neighbors home from war they would have never missed a Christmas no more ribbons on their door. And when you trust your television what you get is what you got cause when they own the information they can bend it all they want."
Waiting on the World to Change

"Belief is a beautiful armor but makes for the heaviest sword, like punching under water you never can hit who you're trying for... We're never gonna win the world we're never gonna stop the war we're never gonna beat this if belief is what we're fighting for."
Belief

"So scared of getting older I'm only good at being young so I play the numbers game to find a way to say that life has just begun. Had a talk with my old man said "Help me understand". He said "turn sixty-eight, you'll renegotiate"..."
Stop this Train

Paradise

Life is what we make of it. After an incredibly frustrating week I jumped head first into another challenge. I participated in the Colorado Outward Bound relay race which is a 170 mile 24+ hour running relay. There were 10 runners - including myself - and we alternated running the 170 miles. I experienced a lot of external discomfort during the race. We were awake for at least 27 of the 30 hours it took us to complete the race. We ran through freezing rain, snow, mud and once we got in the car (wet usually) we were cramped as you can visualize from the picture above. Normally conditions like these might have ruined my outlook, my mood, even my day. Despite the external adversity we finished the race and enjoyed it. During the toughest parts we were laughing at ourselves, at the weather, at what we had chosen to throw ourselves into! We even named the back of the car paradise!

In retrospect, I've learned that my attitude really does impact my perseption of life. I need to make "Paradise" happen a little more often.

Raw

My toddler is flunking out of preschool... LOL it's not that bad, but today it feels that way. She is three and this is her third year in the same loving, nurturing preschool environment. I've only enrolled her in one half day and one full school day. To give you all the background and details would take too much of your time and typing, so since this is a blog I will spare you.

Megan typically has a hard time with transitions and being apart from me but she does always manage to adapt and enjoy herself given time. The assistant director of her preschool called me this morning after Megan's third straight hour of crying. They asked me to come pick her up and this is the second request of that nature. The preschool thinks she is under emotional stress and they want to try to back up and re-introduce her slowly. Both times they have called me to pick her up, I arrive and she is happy, content and in my interpretation almost smug...She got her way and is of course going to comply with them now.

The part I stuggle with is the request of the assistant director. She asked us to be positive and encouraging to Megan. To tell her how proud of her we are for making it through a half day of preschool when for the last two years she has been making it through full days!

"I'm proud of you honey, yea you threw a fit until they called me to pick you up, but way to go! You made it even if you were screaming and hollering the whole time...!":)
Humor and sarcasm are intended here just in case you couldn't read into that.

I'm frustrated. Emotional - yes. My eyes are raw. Did I ever expect to have the child that was observed for behavioral problems by the director and assistant director of a large prestigous school? The waiting list for her class is some 40 kids long I've been told. What's a mom to do? Is positive reinforcement really going to help her or am I encouraging the bad behavior? Am I missing the boat or are they?

What's in a Name?

What's in a name? Is it who I am, who you are? Does it describe you or I? Is it merely something affixed to each of us at birth by which we are called and recognized? I think it can be all of these things...but to me my name isn't who I am as a person, it's just the preface. The introduction.

So I was considering all of this while trying to think of a name for my blog spot and it hit me - "Missing Link". How perfectly it describes what I want this to be, a link to the real me. A link to let you inside my head if only for a moment or randomly. Here you will find pieces of me, of my thoughts, my day, my struggles, my drama - am I portraying my tendancy for that already:)? And hopefully all the pieces left in type will link you to me somehow, and in some way. If nothing else, I am excited for the therapy this blog will afford me:)! Until next time...